Another week already? Damn, time flies when you are in an underwater bunker. Sorry, didn’t really prepare anything. So, what’s everyone playing over the weekend? Read more
Turns out I’m not allowed to talk about my time with the ...group. Sorry, no more updates.
I heard The Division is out. That’s cool. It’s probably a quite fun 3rd person Destiny. Maybe we have an early impression of it somewhere on the site?
Anyway, what’s everyone playing over the weekend?
- Greywolfe (Twitter, YouTube): space quest 4 is gone! king's quest 6 is here! entering the tribal phase of spore in the near future and also...well...sort of making my way through gateway some more. it's hilariously hit and miss. hearthstone quests and magic: the gathering: online quests aplenty, too. that about sums up my weekend. oh. and leveling the world of warcraft mage, while i'm about it.
- Thomas (Twitter): Silence falls
- Scrooloose: Tomb Raider is done, really enjoyed that one. I hope to see another sequel from Crystal Dynamics in the future. I also played through Layers of Fear in one sitting, man that was a game that didn't let me down for some good scares. My review is up now. I'm not real sure what I'll have on the docket for this weekend. My new CPU came with a game code for the new Hitman game. Not something I'm super excited about to be honest, it's play model is blegh, but I wasn't going to turn down a free title. So I'll likely be checking that out. Perhaps I'll also go back in Tomb Raider and complete some of the challenges.
- Dante: Now that I finished Dust I've fallen into a "what to play next" hole. I've been playing Broforce and it's a lot of fun so I guess I'll keep on playin it this weekend.
- Yoda0VGs (Twitter): Well since SuperHot was the game to grasp nearly all my attention last weekend, I'll be finally looking into Rise of the Tomb Raider around Sunday.
Quick update: Life here is quite busy. Can’t tell you what we are doing, but folks are really nice! Food is also surprisingly good. I had expected lots of seafood, with us being underwater and supply deliveries only getting here once a month, but we get a surprising amount of meat and some sort of fruity vegetable.
I also met someone new. Can’t tell you her real name, so let’s just call her Melanie. Anyway, she arrived with the same group I did, so she’s just as excited to be here as I am. Some of the older members can get a bit grumpy at times, but she always has a smile on her face and a joke on her lips.
That’s pretty much all for today. Another praying session is coming up in about half an hour, after that it’s bed time.
Hope everyone is doing well! Until next week!
- Greywolfe (Twitter, YouTube): space quest 4 is done. i'm moving along to king's quest 6. in other news, i'm trying to plow through gateway. it is what it is. i will pick something else that, i hope, is more fun next game :P - hearthstone, magic: the gathering and spore are all i'm doing otherwise. [ie: things i can drop in and out of.]
- Thomas (Twitter): My head still feels funny
- Scrooloose: Been playing Rise of the Tomb Raider and enjoying it overall. Really impressive looking game, has some silly issues that seem like they just slipped by the devs for some reason. But yeah it's fun, been cool exploring the world and seeing Lara continue to grow as a character. I pulled the trigger on some new hardware for the ol' compy that should be here this weekend. Looking forward to installing that and seeing the advantages. I'll also probably finally cave and get my Windows 10 installation done... blegh
- Matthew (Twitter): Sadly nothing. L This is a weekend with no time for gaming at all. I'll get my #4iF article in by Sunday. I've got a 7am tabletop game (playing Roll20 with friends in Australia and England I'm the monkey in the time zone middle) I've then got the gym at 2:30 (so like maybe an hour snooze then out the door and then a friend's birthday. Sunday I've got to do choers around the house and recover from Saturday. L
- Yoda0VGs (Twitter): I also just picked up Rise of the Tomb Raider this morning since it had a pretty decent sale. So I'll be checking out that as well as some SuperHot this weekend!
- Andrew (12/12 Games): Just picked up Yoshi's Woolly World on Wii U. So, I'll be playing that and also probably a little Castle Crashers.
- Greywolfe (Twitter, YouTube): the end of space quest 4! evolving my creature a little more [in small steps and as i find parts] in spore! totally ignoring gateway, because i was doing that all of november and december last year, so it seems like THE RIGHT CHOICE TO MAKE! plus more leveling in world of warcraft, doing the hearthstone daily quests when they show up and also [hilariously] playing more magic: the gathering: duels [!] - mostly just so i can open a bunch of packs.
- Thomas (Twitter): They told me playing games is forbidden down there, something about interference with the spiritual barrier or some nonsene, but I'll probably manage to smuggle in a copy of Rick and Morty presents: Jerry's Game (since that hardly counts as a game anyway)
- Dante: I'm currently playing Dust: An Elysian Tail and the the end game of Disgaea 5.
- Scrooloose: Still playing XCom 2, finally making some headway. Next play through I'll have a better idea of what advancments and facilities to prioritize. Man what an awesome title this is, it makes Enemy Unknown seem pretty simple by comparison. Next will be Rise of the Tomb Raider.
- Matthew (Twitter):
- Yoda0VGs (Twitter): Hoping to tackle Transformers and Undertale this weekend to finally be done with my 4if.
- Andrew (12/12 Games): Will be making one final (likely futile) push to close out my #4iF. May also pick up Disgaea on Steam. We'll see.
Hey guys! I will take a break from doing the hard hitting investigative journalism you know me for. Why? Well, I had an epiphany. The world is a dark place. Video game companies are evil and plotting against humanity.
But there is a group of people who are trying to save us by freeing what they call “Great Old Ones”. I really don’t have time to explain all of this to you now, but if you want to understand, just mark your consoles with goat blood and a messenger will arrive in time, giving you a glimpse in what I understand is the futurepast. Anyway, I’m off to their underwater base. See you soon! Read more
Our friends over at Videogamer.com recently found out that the PS5 will allow developers to build “far more interactive worlds” than with the current generation of consoles. That’s some quality journalism over there (actually it’s based on an EDGE article), but why stop with the PS5? So let me present to you:
Why the PlayStation 6 will allow far more dynamic, interactive AND intimate gaming experiences than the PlayStation 5.
February 8th, 2016
Today I met this really cute girl Emily while waiting in line at McD and while I’m not planning on sharing many details about my private life, let’s just say I am THE MAN! We have a date on Valentine’s Day, which is about as cheesy as it can get, and I’m planning on making this a night to remember. Only issue: it’s been ages since I’ve been with a girl and I’ve never been on something that can be classified as a traditional date. Yes, I have quite a bit of catching up to do and what better way is there than using the medium of video games for it. Welcome to my Valentine’s Day Boot camp Diary, aka. Games to play on (or better before) Valentine’s Day.
If you grew up sometime before the 90’s there is a high chance that you see video games primarily as a pure entertainment product. Unless you were shooting for a career as a Baseball player, there was little to learn from the prevalent design dogma of the early years of gaming: popping pills and hitting balls.
This all changed however in the mid-80’s. Gaming finally developed into a diverse pastime with cartridge based consoles, like the NES, which allowed bigger catalogues of games becoming the norm and development took on a more democratized and in turn imaginative face, helped by the widespread availability of Personal Computers. But not every parent was on board with providing their kids with an easy form of skin cancer prevention just for the sake of fun and so console manufacturers and publishers soon found a new way to entice those that wanted their offspring to succeed in life: educational games.
Be it Reader Rabbit or Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego, interactive edutainment was not just an easy way for Nintendo to grow their market cap, or for me to improve my grades, it also provided some of the most enjoyable experiences you could have as a kid. And herein lies the problem I’m facing today. Yes, there are quite a few educational games available, but most are for kids. The challenges set before me are more of an adult nature however and I’m not sure where to start looking. There was of course the Leisure Suit Larry series, but that was more about getting to know girls, a feat already spectacularly accomplished by me, and as we all remember: Larry wasn’t the most successful womanizer.
Step 1: Preparing for the date
I am starting my search on Steam. It being the biggest digital distribution platform on the PC makes it the perfect place to find all sorts of games and since they have introduced “Tags”, I might actually be able to leverage these to sort through their massive library.
The first problem I encounter: I am not sure how the tag search works. It only seems to list the most prominent tags and sadly there is none for Valentine’s or anything related. I found one saying “Lovecraftian” and while I am looking for a recipe to craft some love, I am not sure how a game like Darkest Dungeon can help me with this. It certainly sounds kinky, so maybe if she is into that, but I can’t just expect that, or can I? Maybe I should bookmark it for our second date.
There is also a tag for Educational, but just as I’ve feared: there are no games educating you on the art of making a woman love you. Not even one that teaches you how to cook dinner. Wait, this gives me an idea!
Success! Entering “Dinner” in the search provided me with the perfect Title: Dinner Date
So I found this game called Dinner Date two days ago and although it sounds like it would be perfect, it really wasn’t. In fact, it completely destroyed me. I had to call in sick yesterday, because I was stuck in this repeating circle of doubt, resignation and aggression. I called Emily a couple of times. She assured me that everything is alright, which felt good, but I still can’t help feeling like this will all lead up to one big disappointment. I might call her again later when she’s no longer busy.
Anyway, don’t play Dinner Date! It’s not actually about dating or cooking, but instead some poor guy getting stood up.
Since the Steam search wasn’t really working out, I asked some people online and they gave me two recommendations: Hot Date and How do you Do It? Both sound promising.
Yesterday wasn’t a full success either, but at least not as demoralizing. The people who recommended me those games must have been really weird.
How do you Do It? was a waste of time for me. You play as a little girl reenacting a sex scene from Titanic with naked dolls. There was no tutorial besides “use these keys to move the dolls” and as a result I learned nothing about dating or sex. I was wondering if the game was maybe made for women, so I texted Emily, asking if she ever had sex with dolls as a kid and could therefore relate to it. She hasn’t answered yet, so I can’t tell you if this is an interesting title for girls. Certainly isn’t for men.
Hot Date is about speed dating some weird pig/dog amalgamations. Besides that, it wasn’t actually too bad. I found some of the pig-dogs quite charming in a way and also learned some funny jokes. 6/10, would date again.
Today we are back to trying out the tag system. Turns out, you just have to enter the topic or attribute you are looking for into the search bar. I also missed a very helpful featured tag the last time I checked. It’s called Dating Sim, which stands for either Dating Simulation or Simulator and it features 56 games! Granted, most of them don’t seem to be very appropriate for the situation, like this game called Hatoful Boyfriend, where your objective is to date literal birds. Like Pigeons! Or Let the Cat in, which sounds like a euphemism, but really isn’t. They are also all very Asian looking. You know, the style seen in Japanese animations, called Manga/Anime. Given the cultural differences between them and us, I fear this might lead to some misunderstandings. Nevertheless, I found some I’m willing to try.
First on my list is Day One: Garry’s Incident. It looks like Indiana Jones meets Robinson Crusoe, two people I can wholeheartedly identify with. I am not sure however about the dating part, since the screenshots mostly show the player holding weapons, but there is also one that depicts the sun emanating from the player characters hands, which could be symbolism for ejaculation.
Second game on my list is “Emily is Away”. I am not sure why this was listed under Dating Sim either, since it seems to be a basic chat program, but I chose it for the name. Maybe this is a sign? It also helps that it’s free.
The last one is called HuniePop and it looks like this is exactly what I was looking for. It features multiple girls of different ethnicities, each with their own personality, which could prove really useful in learning to read women. But the best part: there seems to be a match-3 mini-game in it and when I met Emily, she was playing one of those on her phone. Even if there is nothing else redeeming about this title, at least we have something fun to talk about!
Oops! I realized that my wording in the last text I sent Emily was maybe a bit open for misinterpretation (Have you ever had sex with your dolls as a kid), so I sent her another one to clarify. Heat of the moment, heh. Anyway, back to the games.
Day One: Gary's Incident was a complete letdown. It played like a poor man’s Far Cry and I never encountered any Dating Sim elements in it. Maybe it’s because I only spent a couple of hours on it, but I couldn’t stand playing more of it.
On the flip side, HuniePop is amazing! The models are beautifully drawn, the characters are funny and the gameplay is surprisingly deep. Sadly, it won’t satisfy my hunger for knowledge either and that is because of one big problem: the dates you go on are completely unrealistic, consisting of simple Match-3 games. Despite that, it’s still the most impressive game I found on my journey so far.
Valentine’s is the day after tomorrow, the nervousness is taking hold of me and I’m running out of games. I still haven’t touched Emily is Away, so there is that, but otherwise? I might have to find some more esoteric options.
Emily still didn’t reply and when I tried to call, it went straight to voicemail which has me worried. I really hope nothing has happened to her.
Emily is Away, the game, was interesting, but also very sad. You play as yourself, starting just as you move away from your home town and you are chatting with a female friend, called Emily, you might develop romantic feelings for over the course of multiple years, despite being separated by quite a way. It’s a pure text adventure taking place in an AOL Messenger like app, with multiple choices to take. It didn’t work out for me the first two times, but I’m intrigued and looking forward to finding the path that works.
My search for another game then led me to Save The Date, a sort of Choose Your Own Adventure game with a twist, not unlike Emily is Away. The premise is that you go on a date with this girl, but things don’t end well. Of course you retry with a different path, but that doesn’t end well either. Once you’ve gone through all the possibilities however, things go very weird. It starts breaking the fourth wall and turns into the movie Groundhog Day. I haven’t found a way to Save The Date yet and I’m not sure if there even is one. So yeah, it’s quite funny, but also infuriating and certainly not what I was looking for.
You know what? Screw this shit! Emily didn’t show up today and when I tried to call her, she hung up before saying anything, so I sent her a text stating that it’s over with us.
I really don’t care if she has an excuse, because she honestly seemed kinda fake to begin with.
Guess I’m alone today, but who cares.
Emily is Away is also bullshit. You can’t win! No matter how you navigate through the dialogue tree, there is no way to end up with her. Which leaves me with my final recommendation for Valentine’s Day: “What’s under your blanket !?” A game about not getting caught masturbating. Have fun everyone!
Now I kinda regret what I said to Emily. It’s really not like me to be this creepy, it’s just …I don’t know. Maybe I should ask her if she could give me another chance in exchange for an Amazon gift card?
Hey everybody. Sorry for last week’s WRUP, I didn’t feel too well. Things are really cool now however. Read more
Yo, yo, yo everyone! It’s your boy Dr. S [kill] bringing you another exciting episode of the WRUP straight to your balls! EYEBALLS! I MEAN EYEBALLS!
February has officially started and the G(ame)-Boys at Twinstiq are hard at work creating the freshest content [me] you can find on the webs, but don’t let your parents catch you reading it, because we are too dope for their old-timey minds! Haha!
Anyway, the weekend is super close and that means it’s time to play dem cray-cray games and party with your friends and go to church! I’m sure you are SOOOO EXCIIIIITED [please!] to share it with us, so don’t let me go all Kim Jong-un on your badonkadonks! PRAISE JESUS!
- Greywolfe (Twitter, YouTube): i'm going to be dungeoneering in world of warcraft [gnomergan and the beginnings of scarlet monastery - i'm not a fan of how they've broken it up into "wings."] - that and some hearthstone along the way, which makes it a blizzard kind of weekend. apart from that? more space quest 4. in which i _reallyreally_ steal a ship. finally for my four in february, i'll be tackling more of shovel knight and banjo tooie.
- Thomas (Twitter): Please, get me out of here! They are keeping me locked inside a room and play nothing but Christian hip-hop radio all the time. I just want to play some XCOM 2 for fucks sake.
- Dante: Disgaea 5, Hearthstone, TF2 and I'd like to finish Strider this weekend for the #4iF.
- Yoda0VGs (Twitter): Gonna start on my #4iF with Her Story. And since that shouldn't take very long I'll go ahead and restart/reboot/reset... Hard Reset as well :P
- Scrooloose: Working on the #4if still. Velvet Assassin right now, next A Story About my Uncle, then War for the Overwold. Gonna be cutting it close since I'll be gone for a week helping Yoda0vgs move. But I'm gonna make it!
- Matthew (Twitter): Getting cracking on my 4iF with Homeworld Deserts of Kharak but will also have some Xcom 2 time in there.
- Andrew (12/12 Games): Will be putting the new Smash DLC characters through their paces (with a little assistance from my son). Also just picked up Nitroplus Blasterz on PS4 so I imagine I will give that a shot as well.